There are few women alive who haven’t been to a baby shower. Baby showers, in some form or another, are not new. For centuries women have been gathering around moms-to-be to shower them with love, support, advice, and everything else they need. But what if there was a different way? These parties are often marked by silly games, lots of decorations, a hyper-fixation on blue versus pink, and a touch of over-consumerism as moms receive items they may not even need (or like) once the baby is born.

Now, we’re not knocking the baby shower; they’re a beautiful way to celebrate the mom-to-be and make sure she has the essentials. But, like everything in our modern culture, the very concept can get warped and out of control.

During the Colonial-era, women held “birthing parties” where they’d stay with the mother as she was in labor, sometimes for days. Victorian-era women would shower the new mother with gifts after the baby was born. And nearly every culture has some tradition of women helping new and veteran moms adjust and heal pre- and post-birth. However, the modern, pre-birth baby shower didn’t begin until the mid-1900s. We’re asking: What if there was a way to blend all of these ideas? 

We propose: the nesting party!

Nesting Party for Moms-To-Be

To be completely honest, this is not an original AmericanMom idea. No, this trend has been blossoming for some years now with moms abandoning the big baby shower party for the more low-key nesting party. The nesting party is way more intimate, requires no games, and allows the woman to invite a close-knit group of her favorite women into her home to help her prepare for the life-change ahead. 

The nesting party is not only for new moms, either. In fact, it probably best serves moms on baby number 2 or 3. But what is it?

The nesting party is a gathering of 5-10 (15 max) people who go to the expecting mother’s house to help her nest. That is, to clean, build furniture, assemble toys, set up her nursery, and more. It’s friends and family ticking to-dos off the mom’s list so she can relax and still feel more than prepared for baby. It’s an incredibly simple concept, but still requires a little planning. 

How to Throw a Nesting Party

The nesting party can be thrown by the mother herself, or organized by one of her friends or family members. Either way, it’s best if there’s one person a little more in charge than everyone else to ensure the day goes smoothly and the list of tasks gets done. Once you have your head planner in place, it’s time to start making arrangements!

Day and Time

Obviously, it is vital that the mom-to-be is aware of and available the day of the nesting party. There are no surprises here, so if the party is not planned by the mom herself, make sure you coordinate with her to make sure she’s available to welcome everyone into her home.

Once you have the date, plan for about 5 hours of nesting time. It may feel like a lot, but remember that there is going to be a list of tasks, as well as plenty of time to simply be in each other’s company and “hang out” as the mom-to-be’s support system.

Tip: Afternoons are great because you can plan around dinner which can lead to a natural end time once everyone’s eaten.

Tasks

Nothing (or very few things) are off limits. If mom needs it done, it goes on the task list! A few ideas of what to include are:

• Laundry (wash, dry, and fold!)
• Hang nursery artwork/pictures
• Vacuum (living room, dining room, nursery, bathrooms, kitchen, basement, windows, baseboards, etc.)
• Dust (living room, dining room, kitchen, bathrooms, nursery, etc.)
• Open windows to air out rooms
• Clean all glass (windows, cabinet doors, mirrors, shelves, etc.)
• Organize pantry
• Organize refrigerator and freezer
• Organize the playroom, craft room, mud room, school room, etc.
• Set up the kitchen with new bottle drying station, formula corner, and other baby accessories
• Put away laundry in nursery and organize closet
• Organize books and toys
• Build recliner chair for nursery 
• Assemble shelves, supply carts, bouncy chairs, crib, toys, furniture, stroller, changing station, bassinet, etc.
• Pack hospital go-bag or assemble everything needed for home birth
• Install car seat base
• Put an emergency kit together with de-choker, medicines, thermometer, poison control information, CPR information, etc.
• Assemble changing “stations” around the house, ensuring there are diapers, wipes, diaper cream, etc. easily available where it’s needed.

This is not a complete list. As we said before, very few things are off limits here. Anything mom needs done, should go on this list.

Tip: Ask dad, too! There might be a few things that will just not get done before baby arrives. Help make dad’s life easier so he can focus all his attention on baby and mom. 

Snacks

While most baby showers have some sort of theme, that is not necessary when it comes to nesting parties. Instead, there are no decorations, and food can be whatever you like. It’s always a win to “theme” the food “mom-to-be’s favorites” and bring snacks that she’ll love. That way, too, you can leave leftovers behind for her to munch on as she waits for the baby to arrive. 

In addition to snacks, you will most likely need some sort of meal. Easy options are pizza, tacos, hamburg barbeque, soups, pulled pork, or hamburgers and hotdogs.

Tip: Have everyone bring one frozen meal for mom and dad (and siblings, if applicable) for them to easily heat and eat after the baby arrives!

Activities

Unlike the traditional baby shower, activities and games are not necessary. However, you can throw in low-key options like advice cards, onesie decorating, or a guess-the-number raffle to give attendees something besides chores to do. You can also put on a movie or TV show, create a music playlist, and create a calendar for everyone to guess the arrival date.

Schedule

Finally, despite the informality of the day, a loose schedule is still needed. We suggest:

• Arrival (15 or so minutes for everyone to get there and settled)
• Presents (if applicable – another 15-20 minutes)
• Snacks (a relaxed 30 minutes)
• Task assignment (just a few minutes for everyone to pick what they’re going to help with)
• Cleaning and Tasks (1-2 hours)
• Lunch or dinner (about 1 hour)
• More time to finish up tasks if needed
• Relax and hang out time

Tip: Don’t be too strict. A nesting party is, above all else, a time for the mom to be surrounded by the people she loves and work with them to make her home welcoming for her new baby.

Our final tip is to keep the group small. It may feel weird not inviting tons of people (especially if this fully replaces your baby shower), but you do not want dozens of people in the house. Instead, keep the number somewhere between 5 and 15.

The concept of the village has faded but is not dead. With nesting parties, women can revert back to their village roots and invite the women they love into their nesting and motherhood experience. If you have an expecting mom in your life, we highly recommend throwing her a nesting party!